nelson.

No Wedding Will Top This Wedding:

THE BACK STORY:

Everyday my friend would call me and tell me of her adventures and her day, here is where things got weirder than they were before….

I had a friend in high school, she was one of those friends who had to overcome a lot; raising herself and her sister because her some would leave for days at a time to get her fix, staying with family to family, etc. She also did well with the occasional average teen mistake. 

Our senior year of high school she got her first boy friend. He was much older and already had a kid with someone. He wasn’t a bad guy but he wasn’t unfamiliar with trouble and the law. Soon after they started hanging out and dating, my friends new boyfriend went to jail. Jail. For MURDER. Something about killing a guy with an ax handle or something. She still continued to see him and date him- visiting him once a week with his grandmother. 

During this time she started to fool around with her boyfriends best friend. Then when that got boring she moved onto sleeping with her boyfriends brother. She began living with the brother and their grandmother. There she helped take care of the two brothers kids, went to school, still visited her “boyfriend” and messing around with his brother. 

After we graduated from high school, she moved closer to the “city” where she got a job. By this time her “boyfriend” had married his baby momma randomly and Casey decided to continue her relationship with the brother (who at that time was wanted for some sort of crime, but I am not sure if he ever was not in trouble) She would hide him at her house for a couple days then he would go back to our hometown, lay low for awhile and then return to her. 

Then one day she wanted to get her life straight and under control so she dumped him. If was for the better, but she still occasionally saw him and finally turned him in where he then went to jail. Life was going great for her…..

Then one day a man came into her life, someone who she was familiar with but did not know well. He was her first boyfriends cell mate and friend. There relationship went like this:

Day 1: Hung out officially

Day 2: Began “dating” and kissed

Day 3: Left for quick road trip to Montana

Day 4: Had sex and said “I love you” for the first time

Day 5: Got married.

Now I was called the day before they got married and was informed… There I tried to think of a way for me to race to Idaho with my boyfriend at the time to stop the wedding. There was no way, so I lectured and lectured and lectured. I thought about it all night and hoped she would change her mind but she did not. 

She called me right after they got married (literally 7 minutes) and proceeded to tell me she didn’t want to be married anymore, I sat in Seattle and rolled my eyes and said you don’t have to be. BUT she didn’t want to do anything about it.  They returned to Washington and tried to make the best of it. 

Soon after there return he went to jail. She never really talked to him again- instead she went back to her boyfriend before (brother to the first) Life on good and bad, off and on, healthy and unhealthy. It was what it was, she wasn’t going to have anyone tell her otherwise and that she should get out of the relationship and not look back. Who are we to say anything, most of us date people that are honestly nice, funny, and have something going for them.

She continued to do what she did; work, attempt to go to college as it quickly wasn’t going well, and dating the guy she so quickly went back to. Then one day that were are a friends house drinking. Things were fine until they started to get in an argument. From what I am told them they yelled and walked away, then yelled and walked away, each time they fighting grew stronger and stronger. Someone tried to leave but I am not sure- she was so drunk and probably high she doesn’t quite remember either. Some how they ended up in the middle of the woods around where they were drinking, thats when it began…. her boyfriend then continued yelling and hitting and pushing her. It is all a blur as far as I can tell. He had beat her up pretty bad. She then went to a friends house and called the police.

She later went to court against him. I was there to support her. It was a very long 2 day trial. In the end she got off with the minimum. In my opinion, it was because her trial she didn’t do very well- the social workers there to help her were no help at all. Luckily I was there to help her and talk to her, but I couldn’t convince her that the jury is ALWAY watching how she acts even when she wasn’t on the stand. 

To easy her mind of him she began hanging out with old friends of hers from school. They were a couple that was engaged and had 2 kids (very young parents)

She would stay the night there from time to time, really trying to escape to there whenever she could. That when she began casually fooling around with the guy while his fiancee would be watching/playing with the kids. It was all discrete and small… but it grew. In fact one night when staying the there she and her two friends were sleeping in bed. (Yes- they all slept in the same bed. As if thats not weird and creepy just wait…)My friend and the guy began to fool around while his fiancee was asleep. Fooling around turned to sex. They had sex in the same bed, right next to his fiancee and mother of his two children. 

As if that would be it….  turns out the fiancee knew the whole time. She told them she knew and did not care. Weird. Life went on they sort of stopped fooling around but not really. Just no sex (that I am aware of)A few months go by… then the fiancee snapped and freaks out about them doing stuff together. Things get weird and crazy. He quickly moves into my friends apartment. At this point my friend is over him and does not like him. AT ALL. But instead of moving forward she keeps him around because she can’t stop thinking about her boyfriend who beat her up. She would call me wanting to call him and talk to him and see him…. I had to be mean and say “Why would you want to see or talk to the guy who beat the shit out of you?” etc.. she would say that I didn’t know or couldn’t understand. No, I guess I don’t understand- I have only heard the story everyday from the beginning and feel that there is no reason for you to get back together with a guy who abuses you and torments you…thats just me. 

She continued to let the guy stick around and stay. They argued a lot. When I would go over there to visit with her they would argue as if I wasn’t there. It was awkward. She would say how she couldn’t wait for him to leave and she hated him. My advise didn’t seem to sink in.

THEN they got engaged.

By that time I wasn’t talking to her as much but still talking to her. She called me when I was going to school in Vancouver to see how I was doing. Didn’t really say anything about her engagement, which i found out about via Facebook. So I asked in a “sooooo anything cool happen for you???” She was very nonchalant about it. Very “yea whatever” She wasn’t excited- which WAS NOT her. Something was up. 

But she asked if I would plan her wedding and I said yes- thinking it was the best wedding present I could give her.

When I would visit her, it wasn’t like before… no fights. It was as if the engagement cured their fights and differences. I went with a power point of ideas and plans for their wedding. Seemed good. Then the next time I saw her, a year before her wedding, she had planned everything and made all the decorations. What was there for me to do. 

For a year I had her down my throat for not having anything to do, not coming down every time she called (me working full-time in Seattle, 2 hour drive from her house where she works only a couple days a week). I would ask all year long what needed to be done, what can i do, etc… 

my job: 

-collect a million glass jars

-cut out a trillion newspaper circles (with no faces, no color, only grey and white and black writing)

-and being her “monkey”

-9 picnic tables ****

-24 hay bales and a way to move them ****

-80 sets of silverware ****

-80 drinking glasses ****

-9 white cloth table cloths

 **** (she ended up not wanting last second)

WEDDING TIME (shorter version):

A few of days before the wedding I met with her and the woman who was letting her have her wedding at to clear up some details. After the meeting I was talking to the woman about how my friend was keeping the whole wedding planning secret because she wanted it all to be her idea and how i wish she would hand over some of the tasks because she planned on doing everything herself. My friend then calls me to say I needed to get 24 hay bales because the woman told her she didn’t think there was room- so my friend took that as they didn’t have hay. (I had told my friend SOOOO many times how she needed to cal the lady to triple check there was room but she never did) She calls me tells me to find hay and a way to get it up there. I do that.  But before I finish working out how to move them I let the woman know because there is NO WAY IN HELL I would show up to someone’s house without them know with 24 hay bales. Would you want me to show up to your hotel room or house with all that hay? Don’t think so.

2 DAYS BEFORE THE WEDDING:

It as the “Last Details” party where all the brides maids got together to work on the remaining crafts and details. Everyone worked for zoo long on hand made paper flowers, tissue paper puff balls, etc. Everything was going fine, but my friend had their 2 year old there who wanted to get into everything so that made things hard… plus she was beginning to get Bridezilla syndrome. Another one of our friends had her baby there soo she wasn’t much help either but it was nice to talk to someone while everyone else was talking to each other. It got really late and I convinced my bridezilla friend to let me take my project home and I would bring it the next day to the rehearsal dinner. I went and took my project to my parents house and worked on it till 2, slept some, and worked on it some more.

All morning I worked on it.

PUFF BALL PUFF BALL stack of newspaper circles PUFF BALL PUFF BALL stack of newspaper circles, ETC. The garland took up a big chunk of my parents kitchen floor…. and I still didn’t finish it by the time I had to leave for the rehearsal dinner. 

REHEARSAL DINNER:

I get to the rehearsal dinner, everyone is just hanging out. Then they begin to walk through how everyone walk for the wedding. They ran it a few time. Once she felt everyone had got it down we stopped to start the pre-decorating for the wedding. She was running around trying to do things but not telling anyone what they could do or work on. During all this her and her fiancee started yelling at each other. She was mad that he was not doing anything. He was mad she would get made at their 2 year old who was running around in everyone’s way and yell that no one was watching her. But every time she would yell at him or tell him to leave he would make it worst arguing back. Finally her “new” best friend from work (who i just hate because it like she is trying to be the ultimate friend that was always there but never was… she is like 10 years older than us and know all our stories and i think pretends she was there??) … her friend takes the child and set it in front of all the glass jars WHERE she hits one and breaks it. Her friend then begins yelling at the child which sends both the parents over the top. They begin to yell at each other…. I step inside to get a pad of paper so I can try and get my friend to make a list of things that needed to get done, by the time I step outside she had drove off. He is cussing up a storm calling her a bitch, cunt, etc etc Trying to call her and text her… the more she doesn’t answer the more mad he gets telling her some more how she is a bitch, cunt, whore, etc 

Everyone else tries to get something done while she is gone.

Problem 1: she wanted everyone to sit on hay bales for the wedding. There was not going to be room with the way she wanted the wedding set up. There was no way, so I had the wedding party work together to problem solve and come up with ideas.  We measured tried out ideas but in the end they hay was too loose anyways we could use it. SO we had to use chairs from the tables we set up. SOLVED.

FINALLY his groomsmen get him to leave so she can come back.

She comes back, slightly crying and calls the wedding off. We all sit there stunned. She they rips into certain people in the party about how they can go smoke more pot now since that all they wanted to do, and blaming the whole wedding getting called off on the friend from work. (who tried to argue it out, BUT in knowing my friend all through school, you DON’T do that she will never see your way) Her friend drives off. One of the bridesmaids took the bride aside and talked to her for a long time. We all sat there, not knowing what to do so we just talked. 

Then the fiancee came back to talk to her.  They talked- she made him apologize to the home owner and the wedding was back on. We made a list finished what we could and people left to get there drink on as a sort of party for the bride and groom without the bride. 

As I was driving home to finish my projects for the wedding…. she calls me and tells me she hates EVERYTHING about her wedding. I ask what we can do, what would make it better. She didn’t know. She just wanted to come say “I do” and leave and go home to sleep. She also informed me that  she needed me to find music for the wedding party to come out to, for her to come out to, and for them to leave to. 

OH BOY. That whole night my friend and my parents and I just looked for AWFUL songs for them to get married to. Songs about death, evil women, marriages not working, etc. Then we found appropriate songs. 

DAY OF THE WEDDING:

Went to set-up… she called me every 20 minutes. But everything was going great. I had a lot of help, she set everything up and was ready way before. Food was going well, people we a counted for,  it all was going great (i was given the authority to kick anyone out though if they drank or did drugs before the wedding because “if they couldn’t get through the wedding sober they shouldn’t be there”) The bride showed up finished up details and approving things then started to get ready with the photographer (who sucked but was free) and all of a sudden I had to french braid everyone’s hair even though i have only even french braided my own hair. 

Then it was time for the wedding.

WEDDING: literally 3 minutes long

she chose to walk out to Come Sail Away

and leave to Heave is a Place on Earth

not my choices for a wedding but whatever.

highlights of the rest of the wedding:

- being told if they wedding gets called off the only people who get the beer are me the bride and the seven year old telling me this. 

-being yelled at that their two year old wanted to sit and be with them the whole time and when i did take the kid begin yelled at that I need to go do something. 

-secretly drinking a bottle of wine because no other alcohol was allowed at the wedding besides the beer provided. (gross cheap beer)

-having to break up a fight between the groom and the grooms parents. Two big guys and a big girl with little old me between them. 

- everyone leaving the wedding besides the wedding party and having to do fake dancing photos for people pretending to be dancing to music.

-being called out in front of everyone we know that I am the worst wedding planner ever

- me crying

the worst more redneck crazy messed up wedding

now they are talking about having kids. ugh.